Ninja's Magic Application.

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    BBJ

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    Age : 15

    Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by BBJ on Mon Oct 20, 2014 3:08 pm

    Steam ID: 84747667 (It’s a custom ID)

    Why do you think you should get this whitelist?: I think I should get this because I’m a good rper and I need something new to rp as. And I also think it would make interesting rp situations.
     
    How long have you been roleplaying for?:  Around 2-3 years.
     
    What 'level' of magic ability are you applying for?: Apprentice (I think it would be cool to learn stuff from other Magicians and how to use my abilities one step after step)

    What type/school of magic are you applying for? (No stupid ideas, it's very open ended): Elemental.

    Do you understand that this, like any whitelist, can be taken away if you abuse it?: Yes.

    Do you understand that these apps, due to probable demand, potential power and the fact it's a rare thing, are strict?: Yes.

    Write out your backstory(People are born with the ability, it cannot be gained), no minimum or maximum length, just bear in mind that these apps are tougher:


    Kasper grew up in Mahattan at Hell’s Kitchen. He always had a love for computers and games.
    His dad and mom was of course worried for him that instead of being out with his friends he
     played video games. He also weard glasses that. When he started in school he didn’t have
    any friends and being a computer geek and wearing glasses didn’t help much.


    There was one kid called Jens who liked to bully him. He would do all sorts of stuff to him. 
    Like punching him, kicking him, and say all sorts of stuff about him and his family.
    He was also something called oversensitive that made him take stuff more personal then
    meant that Jens who bully him abused. He got two friends that he cared very much about one of
    them was called Fredrik and the other was called Daniel. He liked Fredrik the most but played most with Daniel almost every day.


    At one point Jens started beating Fredrik as Kasper was taking a walk
    around the school. As he seer Fredrik on the ground while Jens was ontop punching him Kasper
    started charging at Jens. When he reached Jens he pulled him off Fredrik and started punching Jens.
    After two years Jens and Fredrik became friends but Kasper still tried to be his friend.


    One day Kasper and Jens came up into a fight outside. Kasper fell and Jens came ontop starting to punch Kasper.
    When Kasper tried defending himself Jens went so far and bit his arm. As Kasper started to cry while being
    punched Fredrik came around the corner he just looked at them. A couple of few seconds Daniel came around
    the corner shortly he seer what Jens and Kasper fighting he charged at Jens and pushed him away.


    As Jens fell off him Kasper went ontop of him starting to beat him. As Daniel pulled Kasper away Kasper
    realized that Fredrik was the wrong guy he was with all the time and that Daniel was his best friend.
    Daniel and Kasper went to a teacher as the teacher seer him crying and his blue marks she asked ‘What happened?!?’ Kasper also showed his bite mark and said ‘It was Jens’ After that Jens got into huge problems.


    After a year Daniel travled to a country named Danmark where his mom was from. After that Kasper
    was lonely and didn’t have any friends at all. He used his more spare time to play computer games.
     After a while he finally decided to travel to a new school where he got lots of friends. 


    There was one guy who was mean but he could ignore him. When he went to High school he learned
    about computer Engineering. His final exam was 5. At some point he was trying to find something
    about Jens looking what point in his life he was now. The computer said he was homeless. 
    As he seer that on the screen he started to lough uncontrollably. Kasper travled to Georgia
    to get a new job. At some point he was waiting at the train station over at Georgia. 


    The train never came so him and some other guy and a girl decided to see what was wrong.
     When they reached the other station they never found a train on the way.
     The station was pretty close to a forest. They seer a monster ish creature.
     The guy decided to film it with his camera. Kasper chose to follow him.


     When they went up real close the Monster didn’t notice them at all while the other guy filmed it.
     When they went awey the other guy told Kasper his name. His name was Robert and 
    asked him if he wanted to join his Journalist/ Private investigators company. 
    Kasper answerd yes. It was a dangerous job because Robert liked digging in peoples information 
    and asked one or two too many questions. At one point Robert got stabbed by some drug dealer and his guys.


    Kasper of course went over there to get him and get him to the hospital. At some point he seer the same 
    drug dealers threating a woman. A guy named Jacob who was a Magician knew the girl and asked for 
    Kasper’s help and gave him a 1911. Kasper helped him but got into real trouble with some gangsters. 
    He got lots of threats but nothing really semed to happened. At one point the drug dealers send 
    two big fellas who smashed their office. They got their leader send into prison but he was broken out.


     The drug dealers was real pissed and even burned down their office. 
    Kasper left the company and said ‘I will be back when those gangsters are dead’ and left.
     Kasper got ambushed by some of the gangsters later getting shot in his shoulder out in the forest.
    As soon as he got shot the gangsters left him for some reason. Kasper magaed to get to the city for some help. A guy called 911 and a ambulance came to get him. When he got out of the hospital he used most of his time being in the town. One day Robert came up to Kasper and said that Tyroc was dead.


    Kasper then shortly came up to a mafia named grotii asking for a job. He became a contracter who worked for the mafia in many diffrent ways. One day he woke up in his bed thinking 'what have I become?'. He went out hunting allot after that night. Kasper went out in the forest one day only to be attacked by a werewolf. As Kasper spotted the werewolf he pulled out his knife in a combat posistion ready to be attacked. As the wolf jumped at him it fell on him getting a knife up in its chest barely noticing it. As the werewolf raised its claws up in the air ready to slice them down into Kasper, Kasper had a flashback from the time when Kasper was attacked by jens.


    It made him so angry that hi's eyes turned green and he started 
    shooting lighting balls out of his hands at the werewolf. it wasn't enough 
    to kill it but it defently had some injuries and enough for it to make it flee.
    Kasper panicked due to just getting attacked by a werewolf but also because he discovered 
    that he was actually a mage. He had a hard time controlling it. He seeked for another mage to 
    help him maintain control over his abillities.



    (Hope you liked my app. The child part is based of my own childhood although I don’t live in America I live in Danmark. )


    Last edited by Ninja Killer 232 on Sat Oct 25, 2014 1:56 am; edited 7 times in total
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    STALKER

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by STALKER on Mon Oct 20, 2014 3:25 pm

    +Support, Kasper is a great roleplayer who is a very responsible person and takes his roles very seriously.. Smile

    jray123321

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by jray123321 on Mon Oct 20, 2014 4:30 pm

    Neutral 
    Because he has had trouble with his auths before but nothing bad to not let him have this decent rper would like to see this try to be used against tyrocs syndicate 

    Would reccomend that you change final exam to a 5 and not to a A+
    it goes through 1-5


    Last edited by jray123321 on Tue Oct 21, 2014 1:29 am; edited 1 time in total
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    Absinthe

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Absinthe on Mon Oct 20, 2014 9:38 pm

    As far as I know, alchemy of sorts isn't exactly a traditional magic and most people, which I mean the only two people on server have that ability naturally through birth. It's a mental power somewhat.

    Alchemy being metal bending.

    Also the metal bending from Avatar is not possible, they do some ridiculous shit with metal and they lift things much larger then them and throw them like half a mile. Alchemy is meant to be really basic so I mean even if this does get accepted, there's that constant thing of you not being able to lift anything that's heavier then you or to do anything advanced until you were to really go up the ranks. While you might think that's unfair, seeing as anyone who's a necromancer or destruction mage can do things like raise the dead, shoot lightning bolts out of their assholes or literally stop bullets from hitting them, shoot kinetic energy, move at the speed of an elder vampire cuz magix. I'm actually feeling like destruction mages need to be toned down in their ability to be invincible and you know, necromancers dissapearing in the in middle of combat b'cause they can turn into goop and dissipate into the ground / people literally using their magic to make themselves elder vampire speed and also firing lightning bolts at the same time is majorly fucking OP.

    I'm actually ranting, in any case don't do anything from Avatar Last Airbender and don't lift things heavier then you until you are much better at Alchemy - if you get accepted. Neutral at this point.
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    Fuzzy Wolfy

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Fuzzy Wolfy on Tue Oct 21, 2014 1:28 am

    Neutral, for now.
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    Shanaro

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Shanaro on Tue Oct 21, 2014 9:08 am

    I'm going to have to understand what you mean by 'metal' bending a lot more before I support this.
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    Absinthe

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Absinthe on Tue Oct 21, 2014 9:15 am

    He probably doesn't understand it, I barely understand alchemy on the server myself. No one has a specific guideline of how magic works to be honest, we all just learn either IC or OOC, but regardless it's always from players. If we assume people only have the information from the forums, they have nearly nothing - unless they intently read every character application that is posted. So maybe he's just been left out of the loop as to alchemy.

    Although I want him to work harder on his application, I went through QUITE a lot of my effort through my various applications for my one character, as to be fair to myself and others who apply for coolio characters.

    Put some spaces in the paragraphs, make the sentences flow a bit more river'ish and that's all.
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    BBJ

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by BBJ on Tue Oct 21, 2014 3:32 pm

    Shanaro wrote:I'm going to have to understand what you mean by 'metal' bending a lot more before I support this.
    When i mean metal bending its about the power to break a gun or any other metal weapon by folding it or other stuff using pure magic but if i have to i can remove it.
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    BBJ

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by BBJ on Tue Oct 21, 2014 3:40 pm

    Absinthe wrote:He probably doesn't understand it, I barely understand alchemy on the server myself. No one has a specific guideline of how magic works to be honest, we all just learn either IC or OOC, but regardless it's always from players. If we assume people only have the information from the forums, they have nearly nothing - unless they intently read every character application that is posted. So maybe he's just been left out of the loop as to alchemy.

    Although I want him to work harder on his application, I went through QUITE a lot of my effort through my various applications for my one character, as to be fair to myself and others who apply for coolio characters.

    Put some spaces in the paragraphs, make the sentences flow a bit more river'ish and that's all.
    ACually the info about lighting bolts i got from a forum. Alotugh i forgot the link i can say some of the info displayed. Lightning bolts are one of the easiest tricks to do. Alotugh it dosnt do much damage unless you know how to hit someone with it or keep shooting at them. But yeah the way i used it in my app might have seemed a bit op.
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    Pixie Replacement
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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Pixie Replacement on Tue Oct 21, 2014 4:35 pm

    Sorry, can you maybe format the backstory better? It pains my eyes currently.


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    BBJ

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by BBJ on Tue Oct 21, 2014 7:48 pm

    Pixie Replacement wrote:Sorry, can you maybe format the backstory better? It pains my eyes currently.
    Alright made the size of the text a litlle larger and added some more scpaces betwen paragraphs.
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    Shanaro

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Shanaro on Wed Oct 22, 2014 2:33 am

    Im sorry but I made it so that magick is VERY flexable, but you'd have to be a master mage in order to do something like break a gun by bending it up, I don't support that, guns are NORMAL peoples defence against fables and I tailored it so that no matter what you can do, a bullet is still a bullet. A gun is a still a gun, and there isn't supposed to be many people who can just fuck up guns with their mind.


    Magick guidelines don't have a nessisary limit on what you can do within reason, that's why I made it open ended, many people can cover many different aspects of magick, more than I could ever hope to write-down, if I were to the thread would be huge.


    I'm going to be going through magick applications and support or deny them based on what the guide says, anything a little crazy that makes you kind of unstoppable (Ex: Metal Bending guns into submissiion) won't be supported.
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    Fuzzy Wolfy

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Fuzzy Wolfy on Wed Oct 22, 2014 3:12 am

    Shanaro wrote:Im sorry but I made it so that magick is VERY flexable, but you'd have to be a master mage in order to do something like break a gun by bending it up, I don't support that, guns are NORMAL peoples defence against fables and I tailored it so that no matter what you can do, a bullet is still a bullet. A gun is a still a gun, and there isn't supposed to be many people who can just fuck up guns with their mind.


    Magick guidelines don't have a nessisary limit on what you can do within reason, that's why I made it open ended, many people can cover many different aspects of magick, more than I could ever hope to write-down, if I were to the thread would be huge.


    I'm going to be going through magick applications and support or deny them based on what the guide says, anything a little crazy that makes you kind of unstoppable (Ex: Metal Bending guns into submissiion) won't be supported.

    Someone already does break guns/weapons and bends metal at will... Though she's like 10 and is psychic.
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    Shanaro

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Shanaro on Wed Oct 22, 2014 4:12 am

    Who the fuck is this? If I see her on the server her authorizations are revoked or HEAVILY toned down, jesus christ.
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    Pixie Replacement
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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Pixie Replacement on Wed Oct 22, 2014 11:17 am

    That was Red's char, who I revoked due to changing the app once it was accepted.


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    Absinthe

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Absinthe on Wed Oct 22, 2014 1:04 pm

    My character sort of flicks the safety on someone's guns with his alchemy power or drops the magazine, leaving one bullet in the chamber in any case, which still drains him. Bending of metal requires my character to literally be holding the metal extremely close to his hands and it's not very fast either.

    On the other hand the character can throw objects and depending on the distance between him and the thing he is effecting, it can range from a soft throw to something like half kick on a football. I also kind of feel like the alchemy you are trying to apply for is based off what you saw my character do in terms of trying to fight Tyroc when I switched the safeties off on the rifles and then they flicked them back on again - except you know, much more advanced.

    Alchemy should be based on what I've been doing because very little people have had issue with it, I mean dropping a magazine can be a little tough because it's specific and requires you to both press against the button and apply downward force on the magazine. Flicking a safety is just force applied in the one circular direction, which is easy to reverse.

    But you know, bending someone's rifle is kind of worse then killing their character instantly. Your character can die, whatever, NLR. But if you force someone to have a permanently fucked gun, that can piss them off - like that time Annie almost absorbed my entire fucking sword which I worked so hard to apply for, like it was candy or something.

    But you know bending metal, like the barrel of a gun from a distance means you are SO strong of an alchemist that in that same term, you could make the trigger come out of their rifle and like rip out their neck with that very same trigger - or you know, strangle them to death with their own necklace.

    But you know, manipulating the environment in general is risque and should be kept really simple - unless your like a pure antagonist. Because if you do say that you can do something really complicated or advanced with an environment or object from a distance, that opens up the opportunity for you to do something that's OP. Like seriously, if someone can bend a barrel from a distance, they can crush peoples throats with their own necklaces, even an Adept vampire would struggle to bend the barrel of a rifle with their bare hands.
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    BBJ

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by BBJ on Wed Oct 22, 2014 1:19 pm

    Alright fair enough i'll remove it.
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    Hagrid

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Hagrid on Wed Oct 22, 2014 3:04 pm

    + Support. I've seen him RP, and he's decent; I honestly believe he wouldn't abuse and is more than capable to RP it correctly Very Happy
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    Fuzzy Wolfy

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Fuzzy Wolfy on Wed Oct 22, 2014 9:19 pm

    Absinthe wrote:My character sort of flicks the safety on someone's guns with his alchemy power or drops the magazine, leaving one bullet in the chamber in any case, which still drains him. Bending of metal requires my character to literally be holding the metal extremely close to his hands and it's not very fast either.

    On the other hand the character can throw objects and depending on the distance between him and the thing he is effecting, it can range from a soft throw to something like half kick on a football. I also kind of feel like the alchemy you are trying to apply for is based off what you saw my character do in terms of trying to fight Tyroc when I switched the safeties off on the rifles and then they flicked them back on again - except you know, much more advanced.

    Alchemy should be based on what I've been doing because very little people have had issue with it, I mean dropping a magazine can be a little tough because it's specific and requires you to both press against the button and apply downward force on the magazine. Flicking a safety is just force applied in the one circular direction, which is easy to reverse.

    But you know, bending someone's rifle is kind of worse then killing their character instantly. Your character can die, whatever, NLR. But if you force someone to have a permanently fucked gun, that can piss them off - like that time Annie almost absorbed my entire fucking sword which I worked so hard to apply for, like it was candy or something.

    But you know bending metal, like the barrel of a gun from a distance means you are SO strong of an alchemist that in that same term, you could make the trigger come out of their rifle and like rip out their neck with that very same trigger - or you know, strangle them to death with their own necklace.

    But you know, manipulating the environment in general is risque and should be kept really simple - unless your like a pure antagonist. Because if you do say that you can do something really complicated or advanced with an environment or object from a distance, that opens up the opportunity for you to do something that's OP. Like seriously, if someone can bend a barrel from a distance, they can crush peoples throats with their own necklaces, even an Adept vampire would struggle to bend the barrel of a rifle with their bare hands.

    That much I can respect in terms of what your own character can do, and it seems realistic considering the guidelines we have currently - and the notion that we didn't want Magic users to become too OP. However, I've have been told directly by one or two characters that they could turn Jaroth's M60 into a metallic pretzel if I messed with them. On top of that, I have witnessed first hand shotguns having their barrels torn or twisted entirely to ridiculous lengths, and I quote "turning them into a metallic flower"

    I don't like setting limits to what magic can do, but that... Just, no.

    I'm all for people growing stronger as time passes and learning new tricks, be it by themselves or through a mentor, but I think we should kinda review what most characters can do because there are a lot of magic users who've I've seen do or claim to be capable of doing things that just suck the fun out of any encounters.
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    Absinthe

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Absinthe on Sat Nov 01, 2014 9:34 am

    Oh those Alchemists are being raped by Shanaro, anyone who turns a gun into a flower or bends shit ridiculously is PK'd by now.

    That gun twisting thing might of been okay if it was EXTREMELY draining, I mean when you think about it, bending the metal from a distance or just turning something into a flower requires IMMENSE amounts of force. I mean even the strongest man in the world would have trouble trying to bend the barrel of an M4(Which is the actor who played The Mountain from GOT.).

    Personally I think telekinesis / alchemy should  be secondary to any kind of primary magic like arcane. Because destructive magic is just destructive, it's got one purpose and you kill people - that's it.

    You can use it for passive situations like grabbing a bottle from a table, you can use it offensively to pull on a safety, drop a magazine or throw a knife from your pocket / extend the forward momentum of something you've thrown from your hand. You can use it to make a blanket rise from a bed and look like a spooky ghost, to scare people(That was fun.). So since it's multipurpose, it's in a place where it should be weak.
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    Mindpower

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Mindpower on Sat Nov 01, 2014 11:11 am

    I can't really say I support this, I don't like the backstory. It really does seem poorly written to me and there are several... Several things and I do mean several things that make me want to strangle this backstory, including the eye color change and the style in which it was written.

    Edit: Upon pondering everything I -support with every fiber in my body. I've read the backstory three times now and, even though I understand that not everyone leads an interesting life, you can make common place things look interesting with a bit of flourish in your writing and a bit of effort. Size isn't everything and it seems like you're making up for lack of effort in size which only makes it look even worse. There's several spelling mistakes EVERYWHERE, even Denmark is spelled wrong, further more it's so lackluster and uninteresting that I had to read it with 5 minute breaks in-between because I grew too bored. If you're going for a boring backstory, make it short, don't expand it on useless events or things that are usual in our time and place like getting bullied. I expand my backstories on key-events of my character's lives even if boring and common-place, yes, but I do so with the extreme caution to make it seem interesting, give an overview of my character's feelings and thoughts as well as the ones of the other characters involved to keep a gripping and compelling writing that forces the reader to go like "Oh, yes, I see... Oh! Shit, that's nice... Uh huh, what happens next?"


    Once again, I'm pleasantly surprised with the fact someone went for a believable, normal backstory instead of your regular, edgy past although, towards the end it turned into that. Furthermore, the writing style on this is sluggish to say the least, it repeats upon itself indefinitely and does it with the same words, the presence of metaphors, adjectives and other writing elements is almost non-existant and it just seems like you tried to flush something half-done.


    I understand that you're not asking for a lot, but I can see this 'apprentice' level going out of control with things like eye color changes. If he was so angry and didn't know about his powers, I'm sure he would have done harm to a lot more than just the werewolf.


    Last edited by Mindpower on Sat Nov 01, 2014 1:48 pm; edited 1 time in total
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    Zaedaphon

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Zaedaphon on Sat Nov 01, 2014 1:47 pm

    Same with Mindpower. I see this character turning into something that doesn't meet the eye and I can see that just by the way you write. The eye colour change and the fact he shot lightning bolts out of his hand made me cringe, you've put it in bold for some reason (not a bad idea it just made it a little bit harder to read), a-lot of punctuation and grammar is wrong...

    Although on the upsides of things it's very clear that you've obviously put quite some time into this due to the sheer amount you wrote, but I just don't think it's written that well. Not sure it necessarily /proves/ you've RPed for 2-3 years. You've made it seem like size = quality of RP. Sorry if that's too harsh, but I'm being honest-- nothing personal. Constructive criticism eyy.


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    Pixie Replacement
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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by Pixie Replacement on Sat Nov 01, 2014 3:22 pm

    Due to community opinion, and my own straying near that, DENIED for now


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    BBJ

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    Re: Ninja's Magic Application.

    Post by BBJ on Wed Nov 05, 2014 7:20 pm

    Yeah to be honest i wasn't supprised. I was gonna re-do the whole app but then i forgot.

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